Learning to Speak the Language: Abandoning Selfishness for Understanding

Once a girl from a very poor, remote country went to work in America. She learned to speak English, to dress like Americans, and to eat American food. After living in America for a few years, however, she missed her family and took a short leave from work to return home.

When she was at home, she refused to speak her native language. She kept speaking English to show off. The girl’s mother kept humbly asking her to please speak their native language, because she could not understand her. The girl would only reply in condescending quips, “I am a scholar now mother, so you need to learn to speak my language.”

Though her mother was hurt, she loved her unconditionally and continued to tend to her daughter’s needs. All the while, the girl snobbishly continued to eschew her native language and speak only English, despite her mother not understanding anything she was saying. Every time the girl confused her mother by speaking English, she would haughtily say, “You need to learn to speak my new language, mother,” and her mother, who didn’t understand, would just look at her and smile with love.

One night when the girl was awake sitting at a desk because she could not sleep, a scorpion crawled up onto her foot and bit her. And once, she screamed loudly and clearly in her native language, “Mother! A scorpion has bitten me! Help me! Help me!

It’s fascinating how we can learn to speak the language of others when we need something from them.

What if we didn’t wait until we needed something from others to take the time to speak to them in a way that they wanted? For this day, consider speaking to and treating others in the way that is best for them, not you. Do so with no expectation of anything in return, and watch the impact it ultimately has on both of you….